Why It’s Better To Be Single This Valentines

The two words that every man dreads. Valentines Day. There’s no escape from
it. Either you have a special person in your life who you have to bend
over backwards to please, or you are made to feel sad and lonely by the
barrage of adverts for
soppy Valentines cards and soppy films and the sight of
couples holding hands and gazing into each others eyes in restaurants.
Ugh.

Let’s face it, it’s a womans celebration that men have been forced to
participate in. Picture the scene: a sea of hearts, soft toys and
candlelight. It’s not the most masculine of themes. You’re saying
something soppy that you hope your friends never hear about. Then you
present her with a card – not novelty or amusing in anyway, but instead
full of pink hearts and sentiment. And of course, it must be addressed
to a sickening pet name instead of her actual name. Then a gift –
something full of cliches and a lack of imagination like chocolates,
flowers, jewellery or underwear. Whichever of these has been chosen as
the gift, it will not be good enough. Flowers are fairly safe, but the
size of the bouquet is often sniffed at. Jewellery is never expensive
enough, and chocolates could lead to a depression about how much weight
she may or may not gain by eating them. Underwear is even worse – you
could buy the wrong size, buy something not sexy enough, or far too
sexy. Its a minefield. You have to match whichever of the million things
shes feeling about herself and her body that day. You’ll never win. Few
men are smart enough to figure all this out. Lots of men are brave
enough to try…. and they will inevitably get it wrong. No man would
have ever invented this ‘celebration’.

As if this doesn’t sound ‘fun’, couple this with the work that goes in
beforehand. The actual work of a relationship…. Picture your Friday
night – you leave work whenever you want, get in and have whatever you
want to eat. Fit in some quick reps before you head out to the pub,
where it doesn’t matter what you’re wearing, who you look at or how much
you drink. You wander home at whatever time you like, taking a break in
your workout plan to stuff your face with a kebab if the moment takes
you. You awake the next morning to head to the gym, working out the
alcohol and the kebab, then setting off home to watch the football and
be generally manly. Compare this to someone in a relationship. That poor
soul needs to call to let her know if he’ll be home late. He may or may
not get his dinner made for him. If he does, odds are it’s not gym fuel
– which doesn’t really matter because its not like he can head there
anyway. He’s in for a night of girly films and listening to
conversations about how someone he doesn’t know has worn a terrible pair
of shoes. Next morning he wakes up to find a list of household chores
that need doing, and when he finally escapes to the gym he’s under a
time limit – which the thumb print on his forehead dictates he sticks
to.

And then there’s the complacency that comes from being with someone – the
happiness that causes your need to look your absolute best to slide. And
don’t forget about the meals out and the nights of getting pizza and
staying in watching a film together. These things are historically
proven not to build muscle in anyway. As far as your body is concerned, a
takeaway and a cuddle do not replace reps and lifting. Fact.

Having someone in your life is great, don’t get us wrong. Nothing can replace
having someone to come home to after a hard day, and there’s always an
upside to having someone waiting in bed for you. But everyone needs time
alone (I fill mine with protein shakes and tricep dips, but whatever
floats your boat), and this is the stuff of legends to someone with a
girlfriend. So this Valentines Day don’t be disheartened when the media
makes you feel like you should have someone to share it with – you
couldn’t look this good otherwise…. 

Terry Arena is a beast of a man. Some say he was born with a beard and his muscles are larger than battleships. He eats raw meat and drinks whey protein shakes like they’re going out of fashion. Simply put, he is probably your idol, and if he’s not, he damn well should be. 

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